I have a problem…

I can’t stop STARTING projects! Every single day brings a new wave of mind-blowingly awesome ideas fueled by an enthusiasm of dangerous proportions.  It’s awful experiencing epic-sized feeling epiphanies this much. Draining.

I want you to know that these once-in-a-lifetime, a-ha moments of pure originality that come to me on the daily are rarely seen through to completion. Realizing your genius this frequently is amazing and wonderful and impossible. I mean, in order to do this, one requires infinite amounts of time and unyielding faith in succeeding in uncharted territory, always.   In other words FAILURE. Also spelled as simply S-T-R-E-S-S-F-U-L.  Nobody likes to fail but its necessary for growth and reflection type crap.

Failure also makes it necessary to learn how to distinguish out-this-world, unrealistic thinking and real reality. You know that stuff all over TV but I mean the more soul crushing kind.  It makes you re-evaluate your mojo and chip off (or hack) at it. That piece gets lost. And be it my imagination or my spirit or inner child, or whatever, I keep losing and losing some. What if I run out?

Now, by failure I mean not finishing and/or not getting the desired outcome from the initial thought. That is how I personally view failing, just my opinion. So when I fizz out on projects because I lack discipline it’s no mystery or unexplained phenomenon. I’m aware. Fully. I am not writing this to search for reasons or get the universe to answer some cry. That would be dumb.

I just feel when you explain your own personal whackadoodle behavior and attempt to show some method to your madness, not only is it helpful for those outside looking in, but then madness may precede without harsh misunderstandings or threaten those sane enough to stay away from the life of a dreamer. Being a dreamer is dangerous and daring AND not for the faint of heart or boring.

I stay away from absolute mindfulness. 

Sorry for the seriously cereal blog and hope I didn’t bum ya out. I just currently have such huge important projects going on in my life that I must live in them for fear of failure…

There. Now I will be on my erratic, irrational, seemingly idiotic way and get back to the dream.